Key points
- NIMH advises preparing questions ahead of a visit, describing all symptoms (when they started, how severe, how often), bringing a medication list including supplements, and considering bringing a friend or relative.
- Diagnosing adult ADHD relies heavily on past reports of behavior, so a clinician may ask to speak with a partner, family or friends, or look at school records.
- Clinicians also ask about mood and current and past medical conditions to rule out alternative diagnoses.
- UK NICE guidance says a diagnosis should not rest on rating scales alone; it calls for a full clinical and psychosocial assessment with a developmental and psychiatric history and observer reports.
- A 2024 American Family Physician review names anxiety, mood and substance use disorders among conditions to consider alongside ADHD.
Bringing up ADHD with a doctor can feel awkward. Some adults worry about being dismissed, about sounding like they are asking for a prescription, or about forgetting everything they meant to say once the visit starts. This page gives you a structure: what to say, what to bring, and how to describe your experience so the conversation leads somewhere useful.
Who to talk to
You can raise ADHD with a primary care clinician or go directly to a mental health professional. NIMH describes both a primary care provider and a mental health professional as people who may be involved in diagnosing adult ADHD. Some primary care clinicians evaluate adults themselves; others refer. UK guidance from NICE recommends that adults without a childhood diagnosis be assessed by a specialist trained in ADHD. The New York guide compares the routes in psychiatrist or primary care for adult ADHD.
Open with a clear request
A clear goal helps a short visit. Name it in the first minute:
"I would like to be evaluated for ADHD. I have had trouble with focus, organization and finishing things for a long time, and it is affecting my work and my relationships."
That sentence does three things: it states the request, it says the problem is long-standing, and it says the problem has a cost. Those match what clinicians look for. NIMH describes adult ADHD as a persistent pattern that makes it hard to function in at least two areas of life.
Describe symptoms the way clinicians think about them
NIMH's guidance for any mental health visit is to describe all your symptoms, including when they started, how severe they are and how often they happen. For ADHD, it helps to sort what you say into a few headings.
| Heading | Instead of | Try |
|---|---|---|
| What happens | "I can't focus." | "I reread emails three or four times and still miss details. I lose my place in meetings." |
| How often | "Sometimes." | "Most workdays, for as long as I can remember." |
| Since when | "A while." | "My parents say teachers complained I daydreamed in elementary school." |
| Where | "At work." | "At work, and at home with bills and housework, and in conversations with my partner." |
| What it costs | "It's annoying." | "I was put on a performance plan last year. I have paid late fees for months." |
Concrete examples help the clinician see impairment, which is part of the diagnostic criteria. If you took a screener such as the adult ADHD self-test, bring your answers too, but lead with the examples. A screener result is a reason to evaluate, not a finding.
What to bring
- A medication list. NIMH recommends including over-the-counter medicines, herbal remedies, vitamins and supplements.
- Notes. Write down your examples and questions ahead of time. NIMH notes that providers have limited time, and an adult with attention problems is the person most likely to forget something mid-visit.
- Childhood information. NIMH says diagnosing adult ADHD relies heavily on past reports of behavior, and that a clinician may look at school reports or other childhood records. Old report cards with teacher comments are useful. See how to ask family about childhood symptoms.
- Someone who knows you, if you like. NIMH suggests considering bringing a friend or relative for support and to help remember what was discussed. A partner can also describe what they see day to day.
- Past records. Any earlier evaluations, psychological testing or prescriptions.
A one-page summary
Many adults find it easier to hand over a single page than to remember everything in the room. Keep it short: two or three sentences on why you are asking now, a short list of your clearest examples sorted by work, home and relationships, what you remember or have been told about childhood, your medication list, and your top three questions. Give the clinician a copy and keep one for yourself, so you can check off what was covered before the visit ends.
Be honest about the things that complicate the picture
NIMH says providers ask about mood and current and past medical conditions to rule out alternative diagnoses. A 2024 review in American Family Physician lists anxiety, mood and substance use disorders among conditions that overlap with ADHD. The CDC lists sleep disorders, anxiety, depression and certain learning disabilities as conditions that can have similar symptoms. So the clinician will ask, and the answers matter:
- how you sleep, and whether you snore or wake unrefreshed;
- your mood, worry and stress;
- alcohol, cannabis, caffeine, nicotine and any other substances;
- any history of head injury, seizures or other medical problems.
Leaving these out does not make an ADHD diagnosis more likely. It makes an accurate one less likely. NIMH's guidance is that a provider can help you only if you have open and honest communication.
If you are worried about how a request for medication will look
Many adults hesitate because stimulants are controlled substances. You do not need to ask for a specific drug. It is reasonable to say: "I want to understand what is going on. If it is ADHD, I would like to hear all the treatment options." That keeps the focus on the evaluation, which is where it belongs. Treatment options for adults, which include medication and psychotherapy according to NIMH, are discussed after a diagnosis, not before.
Questions worth asking
- How will you decide whether this is ADHD, something else, or both?
- Will you use rating scales, and will you want to speak with anyone who knew me as a child?
- What other conditions do you want to rule out, and how?
- If it is not ADHD, what do you think is causing these problems?
- What happens after the evaluation: a written summary, a treatment plan, follow-up?
NIMH encourages patients to ask questions and to raise concerns if a suggested treatment makes them uncomfortable. More questions for the booking stage are in questions to ask before booking an ADHD evaluation.
If you feel dismissed
Sometimes a clinician says it is "just stress" without exploring further. Ask what they think is causing the problems and what they recommend for it. If you still feel the question was not answered, a second opinion from a clinician who evaluates adult ADHD is a reasonable step. See getting a second opinion on an ADHD diagnosis.
When to talk to a clinician
If attention, organization or restlessness have been a problem for a long time and are affecting more than one part of your life, the conversation is worth having now. You do not need certainty; you need a clear description of what is happening.
Dr. John C. Shershow, M.D. is a psychiatrist who focuses on adult ADHD and sees adults located in New York or New Jersey. His adult ADHD evaluation covers current symptoms, childhood, school and work history, health, sleep and substances, and other explanations, and ends with what it found and the treatment options that fit. See adult ADHD testing in NYC or in New Jersey. To start, call the office or use the call-back form.
Questions
What should I say to my doctor if I think I have ADHD?
Say that you would like to be evaluated for ADHD, then give specific examples of what happens, how often, since when, and what it costs you at work and at home. Concrete examples help a clinician judge impairment, which is part of the criteria.
Can my primary care doctor diagnose adult ADHD?
Some primary care clinicians evaluate and treat adult ADHD; others refer to a psychiatrist or another specialist. NIMH describes both primary care providers and mental health professionals as involved in diagnosis. Ask your doctor how they handle it.
Should I bring someone to the appointment?
It can help. NIMH suggests considering bringing a friend or relative for support and to help remember what was discussed. A partner or family member can also describe behavior you may not notice yourself.
Will asking about ADHD make my doctor think I want stimulants?
Asking for an evaluation is a normal request. You do not need to name a medication. Saying you want to understand the cause and hear all treatment options keeps the focus on the assessment.
Do I need to mention alcohol or cannabis use?
Yes. Substance use is one of the conditions clinicians consider alongside or instead of ADHD, and it affects treatment choices. NIMH notes that a provider can help only with open and honest communication.
Sources
- NIMH: Tips for Talking With a Health Care Provider About Your Mental Health (NIH Publication No. 22-MH-8094)
- NIMH: ADHD in Adults, 4 Things to Know (NIH Publication No. 24-MH-3573)
- NICE (UK) guideline NG87: Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, diagnosis and management, recommendations (last updated September 13, 2019)
- Olagunju AE, Ghoddusi F. Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder in Adults. American Family Physician 2024;110(2):157-166
- CDC: Diagnosing ADHD (reviewed July 30, 2026)
